The Childcare Merry-go-round

It's hard enough finding people you trust to watch the most precious commodity on the planet, your kids.  Once you do, you want to hang on to dear life and not let them go.  If you have someone that watches your child and you love them, let them know!!

I think this is a fantastic face

The good and bad part of this job is that it's part time.  There are not many people that are willing to only watch a kid for 3 hours in the afternoon 4 days a week.  Not to mention we have a limited budget to pay them since I get paid squat as a coach!  Mark and I both agree that I don't need to make money on my job, I do it because I love it.  However, we obviously don't want to be paying for me to work, which is ridiculous.  All I want is to break even on childcare and I will be happy.

Sadly that is much easier said than done.  Childcare is expensive and I understand it should be as people are caring for the most important thing in your world, your child.  Having said that, it is very frustrating finding someone qualified that will watch a child on a very limited salary.  I mean, what sane person only works from 2:30 - 5:30 in the afternoons?  Here is where I raise my hand and sigh.  Most daycare's don't do hourly, and I don't work enough or get paid enough to put her in part time daycare.  In our situation it leaves mainly college students, which is fine, but schedules change, activities come up, and let's face it, they can be a bit flighty at times.

I do wonder a lot if it's worth it, and I tell myself, it is, but some days it takes more convincing than others.  I love what I do, and would not being doing it if I didn't.  I am one of those extremely blessed people to be able to have a supportive husband who allows me to follow my passion and supports me, now that we have the means to do so. Does passion out trump your child?  Never.  Do I want to continue doing what I'm doing. Yes.  I just want to make sure Alex is taken care of first and foremost, and those watching her are reliable and trustworthy!  I think we've found that in our new person, but we will see.

Peek a boo!

Mover and Shaker

The thing that I think is the funniest thing about Alex is her ability to get into anything and everything and her sheer determination to do so.  Hmmmm, I wonder where she got that from?  It is interesting how the stubborn gene that was present in her papa and I have manifested itself in this adorable little 17 lb bundle of cuteness.

The first thing we did when there was an inkling she was starting to think about crawling was to go and get all those wonderful baby proofing tools.  So far we've only had to do outlet covers and drawer/cupboard stoppers.  Mark put them all in time to see Alex cruising and exploring the world.

Loves trying to get into things

 The second new obstacle to figure out what the dog food.  Poor puppy has been the center of our world for 7 years and then BAM! This little thing comes and usurps his place as top dog.  Not only does he get less attention, now he has her going after his food and water.  Rambo is a strange little dog and won't eat unless people are present in the room.  Basically putting his food in the kitchen out of site is not an option.  We decided that we had a little corner behind our couch and loveseat, with an end table in between that worked as sort of a buffer that Alex couldn't get into......for a while.

Very persistently going after the puppy's food

 Leave it to our kiddo to figure out that puzzle in oh, two days.  At least it slows her down enough to make it work for now.  When doing the dishes Mark left the room for a min, until he realized it was quiet, which when you have our child is never a good thing.  He goes into the living room only to find Alex next to the dog dish, with a piece of dog food in her hand, clapping.  Not to mention two pieces of "tested" dog food next to her :).  Oh our funny child.

I know there are many more challenges to come with her new found mobility and creative ways to get stuck, but all I can do is laugh and try to outsmart our 8 month old until she figures out a way to overcome the obstacles we put before her.  The funny thing is she has yet to test the stairs.  Not that I'm complaining, but part of it may be out of sight out of mind.

Teething

I know I know!  I have complained about teething to the nth degree.  However, this is a really tough stage for both Alex and us, and although we're surviving, this is going to be a loooooong process.  It's amazing what the human body is capable of, but I have to admit that this is one of life's mini cruel jokes.

Alex had a diaper rash due to teething, so we were having some semi-naked baby time :)

 The thought of really sharp teeth coming up through the gums is painful! The poor gums are swollen and it just looks like it hurts.  However, she is now the owner of 2 little toofers and it's so darn adorable.  I thought there may have been a 3rd one but it has yet to be seen.  It's hard to get a look most days because trying to look in her mouth is a series of pinning her down and trying to get her mouth open while she tries desperatley to get away as quickly as possible.  She's a squimy little machine.  When you finally get her mouth open she has taken to sticking out her tongue and spitting, hurray, so all you get is spit and tongue and not one good look at the gums or teeth.  Not to mention the fun diaper rash that came with teething.  Luckily hers wasn't bad, but naked baby time did happen.

Playing with bowls and papa is fun

 With the bad comes the good.  Alex is now starting little finger foods and that is so much fun.  It only took a day or 2 for her to figure out chewing and using her new found sharp tools in her mouth.  Between puffs and yogurt melts she is figuring them out fast.  She's such a smart little cookie.  Watching that little pincer grasp and watching her shove a puff that is coming out of her mouth with the back of her hand is so cute.  We're still working on those fine motor skills, but she's doing really well for just starting.  With this new found freedom of eating come A LOT more baths.  She really loves bath time so it's no big deal to her, but more often than not we find a hidden puff or some kind of baby food in her hair, ear, where ever.

Hurray for getting clean

I am enjoying the new steps she's taking with eating even if there has been a small sacrifice in sleeping.  It is funny how teething affects each child differently.  Apparently it doesn't phase some kids at all.  I'd love to meet those kids, and let them teach Alex their secret.  Mostly I feel bad for her, but with the ever reliable combination of ibuprofen and tylenol we are making it work.  As most things in life you take the hits and keep getting up.  A good lesson for a baby who is a crawler and stander!

Big smiles :)

Dance Dance Dance

These past two weeks have been filled with fun, stress, tears, and happiness.  It has been an emotional mini roller coaster over something that in the spectrum of life may not be a "big deal", but it has been to me at the present moment.  Leaving Alex has been very difficult for me especially on such short notice.  I had about 24 hours to figure out something right away, and then about 4 days to find something semi-permanent for at least the summer.  I kind of panicked.  I like planning, lists, researching options.  I am not a great fly by the seat of your pants type person when it comes to my child.  Am I overprotective, yes.  Am I a little high strung, definitely!  But do I just want what is best for Alexis, of course.  It doesn't help that I've had her all to myself for 7 1/2 months, and her me.

Such a big girl - 8 months already!

Things have obviously worked out and we have a good situation for us.  We are lucky to know people who love kids and are willing to watch Alex at our house, and for now that's perfect, especially since practice is usually only 2 hours or so, plus travel times I'm usually only gone 2 1/2 to 3 hours.  The transition to being a coach has actually been the easy part for me.  It's like an old pair of shoes you slip on.  It takes a second to reaquaint yourself and then it's not a problem.

This is a look I get quite often

Although the last 2 weeks have been exhausting, it has also been very rewarding.  When school starts we'll have more of a schedule.  Summer is nuts with two-a-day practices, and getting ready for the first game.  After getting over the initial guilt of leaving Alex, I found that it has re-energized me in such a positive way.  I'm only gone for a little bit and I get the rest of the day with her.  It gets me out of the house, talking to adults (well at least bigger people) and doing things I love, teaching and dancing.  Then I get to come home and devote the rest of my time and attention to Alex.  I'm a happier mama, and she gets a better me in the long run.

Me and Alex

There are obviously days that are tougher than others, especially now with her teething and being sick.  I hate leaving her, but I know she's in good hands, so I don't worry too much.  I also have some rough days at practice, but those are made so much better by coming home and being able to snuggle with my baby.  I think once a balance is found, this will be a great decision for me and my family.  It makes things a bit more challenging at times, and we're finding out ways to work out the kinks, but we will make it work.  I have a wonderfully supportive husband who will do what he needs to make this work for all of us.  I am also blessed to have a squad of 18 very energetic teenagers, who are giving me a different perspective and keeping me young. 

The Onalaska Dance Team at our first football game

Although my time has been stretched since I jumped into this pretty much blindfolded with an arm tied behind my back, once I get settled, it will all calm down and we'll find a rhythm both at home and with the team.  For now we're making it work, and I'm tired, but happy.  Balance is key, so it's a good thing I'm a dancer :)

All Good things must come to an end

Life has been wonderful these past 8 weeks.  When Mark graduated and decided to take 8 weeks off, I was excited but a little hesitant.  I was sure he'd get bored really quickly and then would be annoying.  I was nervous that I would get sick of him and want to kick him out the door to work :).  Alas, none of that happened and the last 2 months have truly been so much fun.

Alex & her papa, yes I hate that bib, but it was during a game at least

Besides our trip to Aruba, which was fantastic, we've just gotten to enjoy lots of family time, and I've gotten a parenting partner which has been AWESOME!  We took turns getting up with her in the morning, since she is her father and an early riser.  This co-parenting thing was a dream.  I could do dishes, laundry, take a shower, all while Alex and her papa played.  He could do his thing too and I feel like it was a equal share of duties.  It's amazing how much easier parenting is when there is two of you.  The extra set of hands, eyes, and just knowing you have help is so reassuring.

SO big, standing all by herself

But Alas, reality is about to come crashing down on my little dream world.  Mark starts his new job tomorrow, and so I do, which is kind of funny.  Thankfully, mine is only part time, but it's still time away from Alex every day which makes me a little sad.  Now it's early mornings with the baby and stay at home(ish) mom mode kicks in again.  The blissful existence of the past few weeks will be a distant memory, and sadly one that will probably never happen again.  I doubt there will every be another time where we both have 8 weeks off and can just do whatever we want.

Darn Childproofing, I can totally get this open (tried for a good 10 min)

Ugh, no I can't :)

I am so thankful for this time that we got to enjoy being a family without work, or anything else to get in our way.  Just enjoying each others company, and Alex getting to spend a lot of time with her dad which she normally wouldn't have gotten.  I'm sure it'll be a new adjustment period for her not only losing a lot of time with her papa, but now some time with me as well.  Transitioning to having other people look after her.  Once we get into a groove I think it'll all work out, but I think this initial period may have a few speed bumps which we'll have to muddle through.  All of this time together has been a blessing, but on to reality and life :)

Control Freak

Ok.  I admit it, I am a totally control freak.  I like being in control and when I'm not it puts me in a bad mood.  Like majorly sour, what's up her ($%* type mood.  I think that's why I'm struggling so much with this childcare thing.

In my head I had it all figured out.  I'd stay at home with Alex, teach her things that I want her to learn, raise her until it's time for her to go off to school, then get a mommy job (i.e. a job during school hours).  Then this AMAZING opportunity falls into my lap, almost literally.  I run into a family friend and a Mediterranean Festival held in La Crosse.  She tells me that Onalaska just lost their coach and I should apply.  Side note, her daughter knows Mark and I and knows I used to dance and have coached before.  The job isn't being posted yet as they are keeping it within the district for now, but I should throw my name in, so I do.

I love this picture by Sarah Schultz, such a nice family pic

Two weeks later, I go in for the interview Tuesday 8:00 am.  They say they're doing interviews all morning and they hope to pick someone by the end of the week.  4 hours later, and I get a message.  "Robyn, we loved you, we want you to be our new Dance coach, and we want you to start tomorrow."  Gulp.  HOLY COW!  What?  Cue me jumping up and down, air punches galore and supreme shock on my face.  I seriously did not think I'd get this job.  This is an established program with GREAT dancers, a ridiculously supportive community who loves the arts, in a city Mark just got a job in, and the ONLY job I would have ever considered taking, seriously, there would have been nothing else I would have given up time with Alex for.

My precious baby

Fast forward 24 hours.  Panic and sheer guilt set in.  I have to find someone to watch Alex during practices, which means finding someone 3 hours a day, plus the additional burden of having babysitters on call.  With Mark doing OB, and me having to do games and competitions, we suddenly need a pluthera of potential babysitters to help last min.  I have no time, and need to trust someone to watch my baby.  I haven't had time to research, to do interviews, ask questions, and the meltdown begins.  I don't have control of this situation yet and that makes me panic a little.  Mom calls to offer advice, and I break down.  Like mom's do, she tells me she's proud of me, here are some options, and it'll all work out :).

Now, at least for the next couple of weeks we have it figured out.  Between a family friend, and a friend of mine whom I trust dearly, we have Alex figured out at least until school starts.  From there, hopefully we'll find a good option, but at least I have a couple of weeks to get things set.  It's so so so so hard to give up time with Alex and trust her care to someone else, and to give up that control.  However, I think this will be so good for all of us.  It gets me out of a the house a few hours doing something I love, and I still get to be with my baby most of every day.  I just need to find a good balance, but I think we can make it happen.

The Crying Game

It's amazing when you become a parent how different the sound of a crying baby is, or a screaming toddler for that matter.  I will admit that I used that be that person that looked at the parent of a screaming child thinking, "Really?  You're just going to let that continue?"  It was probably one of the most annoying sounds in the world.  I would pray that I wouldn't get sat next to the crying baby on the plane, or avoid the 4 year old throwing cheerios at the grocery store.  Wow how things change.

Fast forward to August 2011 and I have a whole new perspective and not to mention appreciation for those events.  On our trip to Aruba, there was a baby on the plane crying before we took off.  All I could think is, "aww, poor baby, and poor mom."  She was trying so hard to shush the baby in the crowded and stuffy plane in which we were stuck on the tarmac for almost an hour and a half before we could take off.  The adults were getting restless and cranky, that poor baby had NO chance!  I suddenly had this deep sympathy for her wanting to help her out and tell her that I felt her pain.

Especially since my parents will soon be out in San Diego, Alex will need to become a good little flier to go out to CA to visit grandma and grandpa. My hope is that she'll get used to it, and I will hopefully not be that frazzled parent whose child won't calm down.  If that happens, I pray that there are other understanding parents on the plane with us :)

I will admit when I see a temper tantrum at the store, I kind of giggle to myself, only because I see my future in that little girl holding her skirt above her head while her mom continually tries to get her to pull it down and stop screaming since she won't let her get that candy bar.  Those kind of situations I understand and I'm sure I'll have my fair share of them.  I hope that when that time comes I'll handle it as calmly as I can, while being dignified (and mortified) while my child goes nuts.  Right now all I have to worry about it people telling me how cute Alex is and asking how old she is.  I'm lucky to have a very well mannered baby in public thus far.  Hopefully that trend will continue :)